Psychiatrist Girl No 1
by Psychiatrist Girl
Summary: Psychiatrist Girl thought that it would be "fun" to interview characters from famous TV shows, little did she know that the day would be more then she bargained for.


Psychiatrist Girl's Interview Story No. 1  
  
Author's Note: All right everybody, this is our first story notebook so it may not be that good, but at least give us a chance. That said, I'll start my interview  
  
Psychiatrist Girl: Hi everyone! Today on my interview, we'll be doing things a tiny bit different. My interview is televised. For all you slow people, *all the phones start ringing* that means that it's on your T.V.  
  
Ash: Can we just get done so I can go home?  
  
PG: *snaps her fingers* No.  
  
Ash: Huh?  
  
PG: All the doors and windows are now locked.  
  
Misty: Oh, come on Ash. It can't be that bad.  
  
Brock: Yes it can.  
  
Team Rocket: What?  
  
Brock: Well.the thing is.um.she can shoot lightning bolts out of her fingers.  
  
All: AHHH!  
  
PG: Yup. He's right.  
  
Ash: *sneaking away* um.  
  
PG: HEY! Get Back Here! *ZAP*  
  
Ash: I think I'm bleeding internally.  
  
PG: Probably. *Looks at her nails*  
  
Misty: Shouldn't we help him?  
  
PG: If you like lightning.  
  
Misty: *Shuts up*  
  
Jessie: Oh! The twerp is paralyzed! James, now would be the perfect time to swipe his Pikachu!  
  
Misty: Horsea go! Watergun, now!  
  
James: Mmm! Most refreshing!  
  
Jessie: *smacks James with a fan* I'm surrounded by morons.  
  
Ash: Hey! Was that shot at me?  
  
Jessie: No you moron.  
  
Ash: Oh. OK. Wait a second.oh. Never mind.  
  
PG: Hold on a sec. we have a caller! Caller, you're on the air.  
  
Caller 1: Hey everybody! This is professor Oak calling. Ash, your mother wants to know if you've been changing your underwear.  
  
Ash: YES, OKAY?  
  
Oak: Thank you. Bye now!  
  
Tracey: How embarrassing.  
  
Brock: When did you get here?!?  
  
Tracey: About 10 minutes ago.  
  
Brock: Oh. Okay then.  
  
PG: Ooops! Another caller!  
  
Caller 2: I want everybody to kill everybody else! *click, beeeeep*  
  
PG: O-Kay then. Well.  
  
Misty: You heard the man.um.woman.oh the hell with it! Kill Ash!  
  
Ash: AHHHHHH!  
  
Brock: STOP! Oh, sorry. Kill!  
  
Pikachu: PI-KA-CHU!! *Shocks everyone*  
  
Brock: I thought that he was dead!  
  
PG: I HATE MICE THAT SHOCK PEOPLE! TAKE THAT! *ZAP!!*  
  
Pikachu: Pi.ka.  
  
Ash: Pikachu! No! You killed him!  
  
PG: No, he's not dead. Just mortally wounded. And probably with a damaged intelligence. Other than that, he's just fine.  
  
Brock: *Glances up* Umm.WHO THE HECK?  
  
Shaggy: *falls into the studio* Like, OWCH!  
  
PG: Glad you could make it. Where's everybody else?  
  
Daphne: I'm here but. AHHHH!!  
  
Brock: *floating around, anime style, after Daphne* Nurse Joy?  
  
Daphne: NO! NO, YOU PERVERT!  
  
Brock: JOY! OH JOY!  
  
Daphne: Fred! FRED! HELP!  
  
PG: *ZAP* There. Happy?  
  
Brock: *Unconscious from the shock* Uhh.  
  
PG: Moving on, Daphne, do you have an obsession with Velma?  
  
Daphne: WHAT? I.I'm not a Fooing lesbian! Everybody knows I like Fred.  
  
Brock: *suddenly awake* You Do?  
  
Daphne: I Do.  
  
PG: I now pronounce you husband and wife.  
  
Daphne: WHAT?  
  
Brock: Say it! Say it!  
  
PG: You may know kiss the bride.  
  
Brock: Yay! Come here honey!  
  
Daphne: NOOOOO!  
  
Brock: Kissy Kissy!  
  
Fred: Hey! Leave her alone! She's my girl!  
  
Brock: Sorry dude. We're married.  
  
Fred: *starts sobbing* I always cry at weddings.  
  
Wobbofett: Wob-O-Wobba  
  
Jessie: Get back in your Pok?ball before I murder you!!  
  
Wobbofett: *goes back in ball*  
  
Daphne: Aren't you gonna help me?  
  
Fred: Nope. Sorry. *Starts crying again* It's so beautiful!  
  
Scooby: Oh, puh-lease.  
  
Pg: Can somebody get him a Kleenex?  
  
Fred: Thanks.  
  
Shaggy: Like, can we move on now?  
  
PG: Ok. Shaggy, do you like Velma?  
  
Shaggy: Uh.like, yeah.  
  
Velma: Really?  
  
Shaggy: Really Really.  
  
Velma: Kiss me Shaggy.  
  
Shaggy: Like, O.K. *starts kissing Velma*  
  
Misty: Fred?  
  
Fred: Oh, no.I'm not gonna kiss you!  
  
Misty: Don't you like me? *Pouts*  
  
Fred: NO.  
  
Misty: FINE! Um.Ash?  
  
Ash: Misty, I HAVE A GRILFRIEND!  
  
Misty: What? Who?  
  
Ash: Her name is.well.  
  
Misty: Spill it!  
  
Ash: *quickly and quietly* yoursister.  
  
Misty: WHAT? YOU ******* ESCUSE FOR A POK?MON TRAINER!  
  
Pikachu: Pi?  
  
PG: Well, this worked out nicely.  
  
Misty: *continuing to yell* I CAN"T BELIEVE YOU!  
  
Ash: Umm.  
  
Misty: *Sniffling* What's wrong with me?  
  
Tracey: Well then, Ash? Answer the question.  
  
Ash: I guess nothing.But your sister is such a great kiss- *interrupted my Misty strangling him*  
  
James: Misty?  
  
Misty: *releases Ahs, who hides behind Jessie* Yeah?  
  
James: Maybe you could, um, help Daphne get away from Brock?  
  
Daphne: Too Late. I already beat him to, almost literally, a bloody pulp.  
  
Brock: NOT TRUE! .It's just a scratch. *suddenly, a man pushing a cart comes in yelling, "Bring Out Your Dead!".*  
  
Daphne: Here! Have Brock.  
  
Brock: I'm not dead!  
  
Daphne: Yes you are.  
  
Brock: It's getting better!  
  
Daphne: *dumps Brock on the cart* Here. *Hands the man pushing the cart $50*  
  
Man With Cart: I'm not supposed to but.  
  
Daphne: He's dead.  
  
Brock: I fell fine!  
  
Daphne: PLEASE?  
  
Man With Cart: Well.okay, but don't tell.  
  
Daphne: Deal. *Man With Cart leaves, taking Brock with him. *  
  
Shaggy: Like, can we get lunch?  
  
PG: Okay, I guess.But you have to all have salads.  
  
Fred: No way! I don't eat rabbit food!  
  
PG: Well I, for one am watching my calories intake. It's salad or nothing.  
  
Daphne: How about a low-cal shake?  
  
PG: That sounds fine too.  
  
Ash: Why can't we have pizza?  
  
PG: Because I said so.  
  
Ash: You're a mean person, you know!  
  
Brock: *Mysteriously back* *nervously* Don't test her, Ash.  
  
Ash: Why not? She is evil, and - *ZAP* *in pain* oh.I forgot about the whole lightning-from-the-fingers-deal.  
  
PG: Moving on, does anyone else have any complaints about lunch?  
  
Brock: I did.  
  
PG: Uh.huh? Okay then.  
  
Tracey: Hey, um Author?  
  
Author: What?  
  
Tracey: I need to get more then four lines, ya know!  
  
Author: *checks back and counts lines* 1,2,3.you were counting?!?  
  
Tracey: .yes. Yes I was.  
  
Author: I guess you can.converse with Pikachu, then.  
  
Tracey: All right.Hi Pikachu!  
  
Pikachu: *Bites Tracey, kicks Tracey, shocks Tracey, punches Tracey, does an Irish jig on Tracey's face, body slams Tracey, hits Tracey with a chair, with a [pencil sharpener, then with Ash's shoe, then with a soiled diaper, then with a chalkboard, then with a can of Spam, then with a can of Spam smelling slightly odd, then with a can of moldy Spam, then with a can of can of maggot-infested Spam, then with a can of rotten, moldy, maggot- infested, partly decomposed Spam with a hint of lemon, then with an invisible parchment carrying ferret who is also invisible, then with a set of Crayola Crayons, (off in the distance a yell of "COPYRIGHT!!!" is heard.) then with a can of frozen cranberry juice, then with a large sparkly pink comb, the with a giant purple jelly bean, then with a recently up-rooted tree, then with a book of children's fairy tales, then with a large cabbage, then with a wad of tinfoil, then with every set of silverware in a 50 mile radius of the studio, then with a beefy chapula, then with a bag of assorted jelly beans, then with a golden outhouse, then with a golden ticket, (another "COPYRIGHT!!!") then with a neon pink sign reading "SQUIDS ROCK," then with a plastic troll in a pink bikini, then with a rubber ball with a penny super-glued to it, then with a mutated coach roach, then with a ranting Swede, then with a panda in a kilt singing "My Bologna" by Weird Al, ("COPYRIGHT!!!") then with an ancient slab of gray and black marble, then with a bag of quick-dry cement, then with a 3M adhesive comfort strip, bandage, then with a band-aid, then with a piece of red felt, then with a pair of Robin Hood style men's tights, then with every dictionary in print at the same time, ant then ends the rampage by hitting Tracey with a dull steak knife.*  
  
Author: Teeheehee.  
  
Tracey:...............................ouch.ouch.oh ouch.pain.the pain, the PAIN!  
  
Ash: You shouldn't have done that, Tracey.  
  
Tracey: All I said was "Hi Pikachu!"  
  
Pikachu: *calmly knocks Tracey out with a spiked club.* Pika! Pikachu Pika?  
  
Ash: Shut-up! They aren't supposed to remember that!!  
  
Jessie: Can we please just blast off again and get out of here?  
  
Meowth: After Lunch!  
  
James: I agree with Meowth! I'm hungry!  
  
PG: We'll be right back after this commercial break!  
  
(Meanwhile in a peaceful town)  
  
Uglaygliah (pronounced You-Glay-Glee-Uh): They're coming.they're coming for me.the.GREEN APPLES! *Hides in a dark room full of sawdust*  
  
Nice Young Man in a Clean White Coat: It's the Funny Farm for this one.and a strong prescription drug too.  
  
(Meanwhile, in another peaceful town)  
  
Ylime Nesrevi: Must.add.a half to everything.and a HALF! Door and a half! Shoe and a half! MWAHAAAAHAAA!!! And a HALF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO! NO! NO! NOT.SOY!!! AHHHHHHH! And a half.AHHHHHH!  
  
(Back at the studio)  
  
Daphne: Exactly how much money are we getting paid for appearing on this show?  
  
PG: Let's see.add that.carry the one.Nothing.  
  
All: WHAT?!?!?  
  
PG: Well, this is a form of community service, so you get nothing money- wise. All: _@\-\*(=);"@?!!!  
  
PG: You should have read the fine print.  
  
Shaggy: *covered in Velma's lip-gloss* But, I can't read!  
  
Velma: What?!? You can't even read? I knew you were dumb, but not that dumb!  
  
Shaggy: I got expelled when I was in kindergarten, for.um.oh yeah! I kind of mooned the governor of Tennessee, and got expelled from any US school.  
  
PG: That is really sad you know.  
  
Shaggy: I need no pity form you.  
  
PG: That wasn't pity. It was an insult, you stupid jack a**.  
  
Shaggy: .Can I use the bathroom?  
  
Scooby: Here we go again!  
  
PG: Scooby, why do you talk so funny?  
  
Scooby: It was part of my contract.  
  
PG: Another thing. Why do you eat so much?  
  
Scooby: Ummmm.ein Duff in ein Duffcot.  
  
PG: 


End file.
